Letting Go of Your Past by John Loren Sandford & Paula Sanford

Author:John Loren Sandford & Paula Sanford [Sanford, John Loren & Sanford, Paula]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook, Christian Life, General, Religion, book, Self-Help, Personal Growth
ISBN: 9781599792187
Google: TQnhGAAACAAJ
Publisher: Charisma House
Published: 2007-12-10T00:00:00+00:00

FORNICATION

Fornication is sexual intercourse before marriage. The cause is not the above-mentioned flood, which may indeed bid to sweep away an otherwise moral young person. But the primary fact is that if a person is strong and whole in Jesus, he can and will stand. “In a flood of great waters they shall not reach him” (Ps. 32:6). Our purpose here is not to deal with surface pressures but to minister to the root reasons for falling. Piaget, a French sociologist, states the root reason: If a person keeps himself virginal sexually, he (or she) loves and respects his (or her) father and mother. If a person commits fornication, he (or she) hates and/or disrespects father and/or mother.

Many times people have come to us who have committed fornication a number of years earlier. They have confessed privately and to others and have heard the words of forgiveness, but they still feel guilty and unclean. The questions we ask them soon uncover the fact that their sexual sin was not isolated but was connected to other things. There may have been anger and rebellion toward parents or a need to throw oneself away to prevent one’s parents from rejoicing in their child’s glory. Or a hunger for a father’s love, so that the touch of a man became so tonic that a “no” could not be spoken. Or a need to punish the parents. Or simply the lack of a functioning conscience because the father had never been there. Or a need to prove again and again that men, or women, are “like that” (like their judgment against one or both parents). In each occasion of confession, it was our task to discover the real reasons behind each fornication. Most often in a woman who cannot be moral, there is lack of a father’s expressed love and a consequent lack of love and respectful care for her own being. She believes she is worthless anyway, so why not be the tool of any man who comes along? Especially since to be touched seems to reach such vacant and needy places deep inside.

Having a pastor or close friend merely tell you that you are forgiven and released from the sin of fornication most likely will not completely set you free. You should, again with the help of a prayer minister or Christian counselor, talk about and pray through all the hidden (and not-so-hidden) childhood wounds and resentments. A love and respect for your own person may also have to be resurrected. Seeing the causes of fornication must not be allowed as an excuse for sin but as root rottenness producing sin in the present. When you recognize root causes and understand that the real reasons for promiscuity were not first sexual but psychological, that can help you to cease viewing all sexual impulses as nasty. It will enable you to allow true and proper human impulses to flow in sexual areas. With the help of a qualified Christian counselor or a prayer minister, you can develop a new sexual identity that will be cherished rather than feared.

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